You =/= me. Them =/= you.

I have this friend.  Let’s call this friend a she because girls are generally irrational.

I have a friend that likes to compare everyone else’s problems with her own.

She likes to say that someone doesn’t know “real pain” because they haven’t experienced the exact hardships of her life.  She likes to say that people don’t “understand” her because her life is so hard.

Let me tell you girl, you don’t know hard.  You have parents that love you, you have a house, you have food, you have siblings, and you have known happiness.

I’ve known darker places than most people have.  I’ve known what it’s like not to be loved, or cared about, and I’ve known what it’s like to exist only as a burden to the people I’m with.  And yet....I seem to be much more content with myself and my life, and I don’t feel the incessant need to criticize everyone and compare them to myself.  I understand that our experiences are different, and so obviously different things are going to cause them pain and hurt than what cause me such emotions.

All life is relative.  Thus, because we all experience different things to shape our opinions, and because we all are different emotionally, everything about life is going to have a different effect.  I cannot logically hold someone to the same standards of pain that I know.  I cannot logically tell someone that their problems aren’t “real” problems just because they may not be the same, or as drastic, as my own.  Because to that person, they’re real.  And especially when those people are your friends, you should be doing everything in your power to make them feel better, not shoot them down and tell them they’re being stupid and weak.

I may say that no one is going to fully understand me because they don’t know what I’ve known...but we can never truly understand anyone.  Not completely.  But I’m okay with that.